Another unwelcome contribution to The Odyssey conversation

Yes. I've been to the cinema.

I saw The Odyssey. Fancy that.

I went to my local Odeon and sat near the front. Behind me, legions of popcorn-munching, crisp wrapper crackling, pop-guzzling people spent the entire movie excusing each other in order to go to the bathroom. I refuse to eat or drink anything served in a bucket. I hate the Odeon website and their app. But it’s cheap on Monday (£7.50). There were no ads or trailers - probably due to the long run time squeezing the slots.

The film itself was good. But to be brutally honest, I wasn’t the right audience here. I didn’t really fancy it, but it was still good. Let’s be clear - this is not Homer’s Odyssey, or any classicists, or anyone else’s - it’s Christopher Nolan’s (with whatever considerations he had to make for market, budget, studio and whatever). It wasn’t really ‘my’ Odyssey either - but it was still good.

It looked lovely, it sounded great, the costumes and art direction excelled, the acting was superb, and the robot dog was very clever. I enjoyed it.

Everyone seems to be looking for problems with this one; I suppose that’s just human nature, but it is still pretty tedious. It’s a big budget film for a modern audience (not academics) that’s designed to make a profit and enhance the director’s reputation as a storyteller and film-maker. Everyone involved needs it to go on their CV, and I’m sure they will be happy with the results.

John Leguizamo is fantastic

If I had problems, they are probably ‘my’ problems. To be honest - I had trouble with the narrative and exposition. Nolan has done a great job of making a complex story coherent and accessible. Using the Charlize Theron character for some detailed storytelling really helped - as did her ethereal nature - I was never completely sure she was really there (a bit like Athena). Unfortunately, there were times when I literally lost the plot. My biggest problem there was with Helen of Troy and Clytemnestra. Her role was so small and stripped down that I didn’t really understand why she was there - and it’s made worse by the duality of casting Lupita Nyong’o in both roles - I wasn’t sure who we were looking at or why. It also got a bit tricky later on where all the male characters merged into one generic ‘face’ - Suddenly Logan Marshall-Green might be Cosmo Jarvis or vice versa.

Matt Damon is fine; I don’t like him usually, but he’s working hard here. I liked him in The Martian, but he was playing himself, which is exactly how Andy Weir seems to have written him. He carries the film well. Everyone is good.

A couple of things.

Samantha Morton and John Leguizamo are AMAZING - just give them the fucking Oscars now.

Elliot Page is great.

I’m very unlikely to watch this again. I’ve seen Oppenheimer 4 times and each time it gets better with more layers of meaning and intrigue - but not here.

It didn’t have enough narrative storytelling for me (not that I’m thick or anything, but I needed help) - when the cyclops was introduced, I couldn’t help but think of a similar sequence in Jason and the Argonauts; I understood far better who was what and what they were doing after a few lines of carefully crafted dialogue - but here I’m cast adrift too often.

I had MASSIVE issues with the dialogue - I know that American English is universal and they need to make it as accessible to audiences as possible - but it really grated very quickly, and accessibility of language went too far for me. Dad instead of Father and liberal use of the word ‘fucking’ didn’t help.

I don’t know who the giant armoured soldiers were or their motivation, and sadly - I lack the motivation to look that one up.

Robert Pattinson deserves an Oscar for looking so mean, cruel and wretched. How did he do that?

Everyone felt human, relatable and real - even if they were none of those things. That’s quite an achievement. Scholars ranting about accuracy and integrety need to probably stay away from the cinema.

All that bollocks about casting Helen of Troy is garbage and clearly a problem for people who have not seen the film. Helen didn’t actually exist - her dad was a God, and her mum was a swan. A black swan or a white swan - I know not which.

This shot of Nolan is the set-up to one of the best scenes in the film and helps everything make sense.